Thank you for your comment, I appreciate your perspective and feedback. I do tend to think in very black-and-white terms, that is a tendency in a lot of Autistic and ND people. That said, I did mention in the section about choice that I don’t try to prevent my son from experiencing any discomfort at all, I don’t encourage or want him to see himself as a victim. I want him to develop a sense of mastery.

Forcing kids into situations for which they are ill-equipped and ill-prepared will not help them develop self-confidence, competence, or mastery. As I mentioned, this can serve to increase anxiety and only reinforce their fears of “see, I knew I couldn’t do it.”

My point here is that life itself will throw enough at our children (specifically neurodivergent and disabled children), we don’t need to pile on. Instead, we can believe them when they say something is too much, and help them trust their own perceptions, while also teaching them the skills they need to tackle problems that arise — sometimes with our help, and sometimes independently.